It’s not a “fiasco”, it’s your choice to behave that way and you have a multitude of sins you’re welcome to apologize for, which I would consider a good start toward moving on. When you fuck up, you need to say you’re sorry for how you behaved inappropriately, not attempt to shift it onto others, blame others for talking, etc.

The door is open, the move is yours, but you had best put your heart into it, because you really hurt me in ways that feel like you did it for sport or out of rage, and I’d like the former impression to be wrong. You’re even welcome to do it by email, I PMed you my address on Reddit.

Can we just treat that fiasco on reddit as a teachable moment and move on? You have my apologies.

Honestly, I think we are ready for the trans community to be for all trans people. My experience with confronting CAFAB/genderqueer dominance of trans* and how the group balanced out and became more tolerant in a few months tells me that it can be done. It’s just a matter of working out issues and more than a little persistence.

Ameliabee’s comments were, politely, a slap in the face that maybe we’re not ready for the trans community (or “transcentric space”, the takeaway from my article tbqh) to be for all trans people, and why excluding certain groups of trans people, usually trans women, only serves to reify and support cisnormative structures being what we’re trying to copy.

We shouldn’t be trying to copy cis people, though. We should be understanding that yes, we are different, and by and through accepting our difference that we have every right to exist as much as cis people even if we are different, even if we spend most of our lives passing as cis people, it doesn’t change a goddamned thing.