ACCOZZAGLIA

i’m applying for university. today.

well, at least as much as I can without my 2001 tax returns (which are about to be unboxed and mailed to me from back east, courtesy of svairini) and SAT I scores, the latter which I never got to take when I was in high school.

it’d be nice to make an attempt at the SAT by March, but by pushing myself to do such, it means that i have to divert myself from the intense job search i’m already having to confront. also, while it’s entirely possible to apply and be admitted with SAT scores, I’m aware that it’s altogether difficult to do such.

at this point, I’m not sure what to do. it seems like I’ve always taken the hard road, perhaps in hopes that doing such would make me wiser. instead, I think it just made me empty-handed and utterly jaded.

i’m tired of being jaded.

but I also realise that taking the SAT now could have bad implications, since i’ve had no preparation. also, given how the majority of SAT entrants are in high school — and far more prepped than i am — i’m not sure my score for taking the test (sod knowledge, which isn’t what this is about) would be weighted accordingly for the factor of being so old.

i just want to make this work.

at my core, I don’t allow myself to admit it, but I know that I’m probably not a failure — depsite feeling like one far too often these days.